i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Randomize