I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Randomize
