The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
