I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
