just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
