Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
