Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Randomize
