i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
