He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Randomize
