no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
