Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize