Don't you send me to vm
If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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