Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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