All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Randomize
