I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
