Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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