the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Randomize