I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
i think i have herpe
just one?
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
