I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
