I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
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