we're blogging at a bar
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
