im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Randomize
