I want to stick my p in your. b.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize