I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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