He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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