Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
