Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
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