Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Randomize
