3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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