ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
