My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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