I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
