I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
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