It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Randomize
