All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
