but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
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