Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
