Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Randomize
