dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
i think i scared a bird with my dick
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
