C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
someone get that fucking seahorse.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
