Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
home. puking in laundry basket.
she peed on how many people?
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
