I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
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