The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize
