I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Randomize
