wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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