Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
