Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I came so hard my ears popped.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
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