Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize
