her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize