it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Slut skills are useful in every country.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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