Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
